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@Clarence:
“…rather low for the most part, say 20 or less for a 30 year old barring exceptional circumstances. other men may think it’s 10 or less, please remember its not the number”
Whoa, you think 20 is rather low? I think “most” men will have a problem with the woman’s number being anything in the double digits. And yes the absolute number matters, not just how she FEELS ABOUT it.

PJL says:
August 14, 2010 at 4:45 pm
@Susan,

“I couldn’t agree more. I believe that women have no right to expect men to be chivalrous or provide for them. They should always offer to pay their share, but personally, I think it’s classy when a guy declines. In that case, the woman should pay for the second date, second round, whatever. She should give as much as she takes, cooking dinner, surprising him with tickets, etc. In my experience, when both people are generous, they wind up sharing the expenses and no one feels taken advantage of.”

.
Feeling taken advantage of is probably the no.1 reason I began searching the internet for advice on handling women. If you scratch that one hard enough, you’ll even discover smoldering resentment that I’m sincerely trying to smother. I’m not half as generous an entertainer with single women as I am with men & their wives/girlfriends for this very reason. The latter get home-made meals and desserts (I cook better than most); the former get tea if they’re lucky. This is a new policy. In response to years of flaking and BS, I’d finally decided that I’d had enough with that shit–if you’ll pardon my language–and man’d up. My next love interest will faint when I make her a grilled cheese sandwich. My pals get the three course meal. Unfortunately, this is how jerks are made.

Clarence says:
August 14, 2010 at 4:48 pm
JOT,

No, in my opinon UNDER a certain number (which varies by man but is hardly ever over 20 for a 30 year old and is often less) most men just need to know she had decent reasons for it. Unless you are a secular nutcase who thinks every woman you meet should be a virgin, or very religious the SMART man will consider things in context. It’s easy for a woman to rack up 5 or even ten notches in the 4 college y ears for example. In my example that would be HALF her life time sexual partners in 4 years. The other eleven “active years” (say from 15 or 16 up to 30) she would then be averaging LESS than one per year. That’s hardly the behaviour of some girl who goes out every weekend and skanks it up, plus it allows some room for some decently long monogamous relationships.
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